Lily, Aren't You a Little Paranoid?
by SapphireKisses
Summary: .:TRANSLATION:. One-Shot. “Huh… Potter, since I tell you there’s a GHOST in my room!” “There are ghosts all over Hogwarts, Lily.” “But this one is diabolical and wants to rape me!” “Lily, aren’t you a little paranoid?” JPLE.


_**Disclaimer**__: The world of Harry Potter and the characters belong to J. K. Rowling._

_**TRANSLATION**__: This is the work of _**Emaraude-chan**_, translated from French into English by me_

_**Happy Reading!**_

_**Lily, Aren't You A Little Paranoid?**_

It's a dark night, like the ones I hate. The kind of night where sleep eludes you because of an ever-present, foreboding silence that warns that something bad is about to happen. And something bad for who? Well, yours truly of course. Lying down on my bed, I'm the only one who's awake, my eyes wide open. I pray incessantly for this night to end. I shoot a glance at my clock. Midnight… the time of phantoms, monsters hidden underneath beds, in the cupboards…

Shit! The cupboard door! It's open. Was it always like that? I don't think so… And if there was… something inside… a scary something…

A soft noise to my right makes me jump. I hear the floor squeak. I was sure now- there was someone in the room! The wind blows, reverberating against the windowpane. I thoughasylumt the wind was howling especially hard. So hard, in fact, that I even though I heard a real howl. And if someone was howling… wait, I thought I heard someone scream! It wasn't just the wind. There was a murderer! And he'd come to kill _me_? Why me? Because I'm the main target! Stop asking why, I don't know! I swallow hard, and with difficulty. That's it I'm going to die! This is the end for me!

The wind begins to blow harder and harder. It's a bad sign, I'm telling you. In all those Muggle horror movies, the ghost always comes when the wind is blowing. I remember one film I saw where the woman is raped by the ghost that no one can see but he came when the wind was howling. That means I'm going to be raped! No, no, no! I'm going to hold on to my virginity! Of course I don't want my first time to be with a phantom!

This wind blows so hard that the window opens. I jump and sit up, on guard. How could the others sleep when I was being raped by a ghost!? I think it's possessing them!

Suddenly I see the monster… it looks like a Dementor, all black and big. My god! It doesn't have a face! Unable to scream, I run out of the dormitory and tumble down the stairs like an insane person who should be in an asylum. I could only hear my heart beating like a drum. Unfortunately (why do I always end up with the bad luck?) I miss the last step and fall. He's going to come! He's going to rape me and eat me too! Well, at least I won't die a virgin…

But to my huge surprise, it wasn't the ground I fell upon but a body. I quickly open my eyes and see Potter under me, unconscious.

No! I'm sure he's dead! It had been him who'd screamed just a while ago. He'd tried to save me and now he's dead. Noooooo! It couldn't be! Who's going to save me now?

This idiot is incapable, I'm telling you. He says he likes me but he can't even save me from an angry spirit! Ok, the fact that he hasn't told me he likes me since the beginning of 7th year doesn't count!

I grab him by the collar and shake him like a crazy person. He still doesn't open his eyes but I continue.

"Potter, you imbecile, wake up!"

After a few more shakes, the idiot finally opens his eyes and looks at me, surprised. And suddenly I was overcome with joy. Potter was going to save me! And to thank him for his future heroic act, I jump into his arms.

Why is he so shocked? I'm not that heavy! I'm even on a diet!

"E- Evans?"

"Potter, my savior! You're alive!"

He looks at me like I'm an alien from Saturn and then lowers his eyes. But why is he looking at me like that? I, too, lower my eyes and notice our position was a bit… umm… well, basically, I am straddling him while still in my nightdress. Oh thank Merlin my nightdress wasn't hideous. There could have been nothing worse than that!

I detach myself form Mr. Potter and sit down next to him. He is blushing bright red. It should be said that he was soon going to face a ghost. It's not nothing my friends.

"Evans, why are you calling me your… savior? And what are you doing here this late?"

Who does he think he is? Inspector Gadget?

"I could ask you the same question. And you're my savior because you're going to fight this… thing…" I whisper the last word. The fear that had invaded me hadn't left yet. Potter raises his eyebrows and looks at me, confused.

"What thing?"

"In my bedroom," I continue to whisper, "there's a monster!"

Potter looks amused by my proclamation. But it's not funny! And what's he waiting for to take out his wand and fight the ghost?

"You must have had a nightmare," he tells me kindly.

This guy is stupid!

"Huh… Potter, since I tell you there's a GHOST in my room!"

"There are ghosts all over Hogwarts, Lily."

"But this one is diabolical and wants to rape me!"

This guy can't see the truth. What's the truth? That he must prove his so-called love for me by battling a phantom. And he trembles. Instead of taking up responsibility, Potter was laughing like a monkey.

"Lily, aren't you a little paranoid?"

"Me? Paranoid? No way!"

Potter calms down and stops laughing like a psychopath.

"Ok, if you are that afraid, we could go see."

I hesitate. I hope that Spectro the Demonic (yeah I finally named it) doesn't eat me. Potter Accio-s his broom and flies up the stairs to towards the girls' dormitories. Because he is a guy (since he hasn't been proven otherwise) he can't climb the stairs or they turn into a slide. As for me, I follow behind. Once we arrive in front of the door to my room, I hide myself discreetly behind Potter. In case Spectro wants to attack me, Potter would be in front. Potter purses his lips. I bet that he is trying not to laugh. Bastard.

Finally he opens the door and goes inside, followed by me. The window is closed and all the girls are sleeping peacefully. To my surprise, there is no trace of Spectro the Demonic!

"You see there's nothing," Potter tells me with a small smile.

I'm still not reassured.

"I swear there was something here. And plus the window was open because a gust of wind opened it! I bet Spectro the Demonic closed it and it's now waiting to find me alone so it can attack me."

"I'm sure it's Jade or one of the other girls who closed the window," Potter responds, still with the amused smile on his face.

"I don't care. I'm going to sleep in the Common Room," I tell him, leaving. Potter follows behind me.

"But Evans, it's cold in the Common Room."

"You think the fire place is just for Santa Clause?"

Oh dear God! I'm smiling sarcastically like the Slytherins. But now that I'd climbed down the stairs, I saw what the Common Room looks like at night. And trust me- it's not as nice as my room.

It is dark and the furniture looks like menacing creatures ready to attack. The cold of the room freezes me from head to toe. The moon gives the room a supernatural glow that terrifies me. I couldn't sleep here! Where was Potter when you needed him?

"Potter?" I squeak like a mouse.

"Yes, my damsel in distress," the idiot asks, descending the stairs on his broom (which was as stupid as him).

"I can't sleep here!"

"Why not? I thought you wanted to," he asks, a little lost.

"This room exudes evil, Potter."

Potter sighs, tired. He wasn't going to be the hero then! Tell me right now that I'm annoying.

"Lily there's nothing in your room, or in the Common Room, or in Dumbledore's beard! Now I'm going to sleep and you should do the same."

He was going to leave but a cry stops him.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" I groan, hanging on to his arm.

I know, I know, where is my dignity? But I prefer sending it on vacation to Hawaii rather than have it die because it was assassinated by satanic furniture. My pride likes to dance on the beach very much. It has always been its dream.

Potter looks at me, raising an eyebrow, confused by my behavior.

"What do you want?"

Good question.

I ask in a small voice, "Can you stay with me?"

"Excuse me?"

Asshole. He heard perfectly well. He even proves it by smirking at me victoriously. I shoot him a glare and stand up. My dignity has returned from its vacation.

"Nothing! Go to hell!"

Angry, I turn to return to my room to give up myself to Spectro. It's really too bad… I like my life. But a jerk, whose hair looks like a bird's nest, pulls me back by the hand.

"Come on Lily, I was just teasing… I'll stay with you."

I'm tempted to say no but… Between Spectro the Demonic and James Potter, I prefer James. Without waiting for me, he lights the fire and settles himself on the largest and most comfortable sofa. He summons two comforters. He puts one on himself and one next to him. Finally Potter looks at me, waiting for me to make some sort of movement.

"Are you frozen to that spot or do you think I'm possessed and that's why you won't come near me?"

Oh no! I hadn't thought of that! And what if Potter was possessed by Spectro the Demonic!?

"That's true Potter!" I cry. "How would I know you aren't?"

Sighing, Potter sits up with a small smile on his lips. He kneels in front of me and asks me a question. His question.

"Lily, will you go out with me?"

His mocking smile hasn't left his face and I have to say I'm won over.

"Ok fine, that's fine," I say on my way to the sofa.

When I've settled down under the comforter I notice something. Potter is looking at me with a stunned look. Had I said something to offend him?

"You… you want to go out with me?"

Huh? Is he crazy? When had I said that? Suddenly, God presents me with a bit of wisdom and I understand why my "ok fine, that's fine," had shocked him.

"Of course not! I was referring to the fact that I believed that you were really Potter and not possessed by Spectro the Demonic."

He stays there, still not believing that I hadn't said yes. He looks a little stupid there, kneeling on the ground, his eyes wide open…

One on hand, I believe that he doesn't give a damn about me. He hadn't asked me out since the beginning of 7th year. So I thought he'd forgotten me. But seeing his reaction there… I don't think that's the case. Of course that doesn't make me happy! Of course not….

I don't think I sound very convincing…

Finally Potter gets comfortable on the sofa, next to me. He puts the comforter over him like I'd done for myself. We stay silent for a few moments. Potter falls asleep quickly, leaving me alone. And while he sleeps, I see all the furniture that look like they're taunting me and telling me that now my protector was sleeping, I was at their mercy.

Slightly frightened, I shift a little closer to Potter. But it's not close enough in case there is a surprise attack with the lamp… Ok, a tiny bit closer. No, no, this wasn't good! There was a strangely shaped shadow there… it looks like a mad squirrel. It could be dangerous, a mad squirrel… a little bit closer won't do much harm…

I'm almost on top of Potter. I look around me, paying attention to the slightly possibility of an attack. Suddenly the flames in the chimney waver and create shadows, making me jump. And because it is the only reassurance, I bury my head in James' chest. I thank Merlin he hadn't woken up.

I leave my head in this position. Strangely enough, Potter reassures me. True he's strong… and not as mean. He was very nice today. I was being kind of… bizarre and a little crazy but he had agreed to stay with me all the same… Plus he smells rather good…

And with these thoughts about Potter, I fall asleep.

**OoOoOoO**

A young girl descends the stairs softly. Her black hair, which has some red streaks in it, is ruffled and she's still in her Donald Duck pajamas (of whom she's a huge fan). Once in the Common Room of Gryffindor, she lights the tip of her wand and what she sees on the couch makes her laugh. James Potter is sleeping with Lily Evans snuggled up to him, hugging him close.

Jade smiles widely at seeing her best friend like that. It had been a good idea to scare her. And she had been right, Lily had fallen down the stairs, and like she had predicted, James had come back at twelve fifteen like every night, and he had cleverly caught her.

Happy with how everything turned out, she returns to her room and lies down, a small smile on her lips. She shoots a glance at her cape, which is hanging on the coat rack.

"Good night, Spectro the Demonic."


End file.
